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Post by mdpthatsme on Aug 24, 2010 23:22:30 GMT -5
I think imagery is the hardest thing to grasp nowadays, for a lot of people rely on visual image of movies, pictures, and video games rather than "seeing" it in their head. Therefore, this thread is for us to write anything we want in imagery. I don't care if you're describing a dog peeing on a fire hydrant or talking about the Great Alps. Let's get imaginary!
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Post by Velvet on Mar 1, 2011 21:51:54 GMT -5
Thought I'd give this a try. I really need to work on my descriptive skills.
Insatiable
Her teeth sank into its pink, supple skin. It had been burned a golden red by the sun but that was okay, she was famished, pulsing with need for food. Its scent invaded her nose and made her shiver with repressed need.
She did not begrudge the ruby tint, no more than she did the light traces of fur that covered the beguiling flesh of it. Its juice, its blood, slid across her tongue as she wrapped her lips around it; her mouth expanded and contracted as she pulled at the meat with her teeth and sucked, sucked, sucked it dry of its provocative sweetness.
Her long fingers sought the trace fluids that had escaped down the sides of her mouth. One by one her tongue wound around and fondled each of her fingers, cleaning them of the succulent flavor.
She licked her lips and threw the now useless shell away. Her body arched and stretched in a parody of a lioness in the wild; her eyes lingered over the other delicacies waiting to be sampled and she almost purred with pleasure when they fell on her next target.
There's nothing she loved more than feasting on ripened peaches after a long day in the sun.
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Post by mdpthatsme on Mar 2, 2011 15:01:11 GMT -5
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Post by Velvet on Mar 2, 2011 18:42:08 GMT -5
Oh goody! That means it worked! I was trying so hard to keep the clues from being too obvious. LOL I'm glad you were surprised!
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pinkfiend1
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Missing everyone
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Post by pinkfiend1 on Mar 2, 2011 19:56:05 GMT -5
That was brilliant Velvet. I really loved that first sentance.
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Post by Velvet on Mar 28, 2011 10:43:08 GMT -5
*hugs* Thank you Pink!
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bria
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Peace, Love, Joy
Posts: 19
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Post by bria on Mar 28, 2011 17:50:45 GMT -5
I totally agree with you mdpthatsme. Funny thing is, my friend Brittney and I were talking about this the other day. She had asked me why do I like to describe things so much if I use pictures? I replied that I believe that writing is much more interesting with imagery and plus, with my pictures I like to only take photos of what I feel are really important to be shown or what I feel you may get more of the meaning and feeling of if I show the picture. Also I feel that imagery gives of more of the mood and the tone of than the picture would.
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choco
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Post by choco on Mar 29, 2011 1:11:00 GMT -5
I love description. My sister might love it even more because whenever I tell her something that might have happened to me she wants, to know what the color of the sky, the color of the trees on the block, the stray lint on the other person's clothing. I'm working on making my pictures good but sometimes words can express so much more than a picture can. Velvet, that was great. I love the little twist at the end. I want to give it a try, though it probably won't be as lovely and 'succulent' as yours, Velvet. =) This wasn't suppose to be right but it felt so incredibly right. Perhaps it was the familiarity of her scent, of being close to her, of feeling her narrow waist and wide hips, her breasts pressing into his chest, of simply missing her.
He could only hope that she wouldn't pull away or scream or bite his lip in disgust. More importantly, he hoped that she wouldn't leave because the emotional ramifications of his heart being continually tattered was definitely producing painful physical consequences. But how could he help it? Wanting her, loving her was as natural as breathing for him and it felt as though doing otherwise was just a way to slowly lose consciousness from lacking an essential. His best guess was that she needed him as much as he needed her, though they may have tried to convince themselves otherwise.
He kissed her and could feel whatever fight she had in her drain out of her body as she allowed herself to be consumed. Logic told him to stay away, that the beating in his chest from the excitement he was presently feeling would only be replaced with unnecessary aching later on. He wanted her, even if it hurt. Indulging himself in this feeling was turning out to be the most painful.
*** White. It would be much easier for things to just fade to white, as though that action could erase everything. Maybe it was a trick of the mind to believe fading to white was much better than better than black. The outcome would still be the same.
She pulled the sheet closer to her which followed by her involuntarily cuddling closer to him. He was still bracing himself to see her after image than her getting closer. She felt his chin rest atop her head and used his free arm to pull her closer.
She watched the dust particles dancing slowly through the air due the slip of sunlight wandering in through the blinds. They laid in silence, which didn't feel awkward. The situation between them was already unhealthy.
"I never thought a carpet could be so comfortable," she said.
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Post by mdpthatsme on Mar 29, 2011 11:42:02 GMT -5
Talk about description, choco, that was amazing!
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pinkfiend1
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Post by pinkfiend1 on Mar 29, 2011 16:11:26 GMT -5
That was brilliant choco
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Post by sb on Mar 29, 2011 16:29:07 GMT -5
oh I agree! Both pieces are brilliant!
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choco
Full Member
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Post by choco on Mar 29, 2011 22:29:58 GMT -5
Thanks everyone. It was a piece I had written sometime in 2009. I was using it as therapeutic writing too. Re-reading it now made me blush a little.
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Post by Velvet on Mar 30, 2011 20:10:40 GMT -5
Brilliant piece of writing Choco! I don't believe you have any problems with description at all!
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