Post by bex on Jan 8, 2011 4:10:40 GMT -5
Disclaimer: Bex is insane, and what she says is not usually meant to be taken seriously. No animals were harmed in the typing of this post.
I want to write. I do. I want to write words and stories and dialogue and punctuation marks and adjectives and...you get it. I want to focus and create and get excited and more often than not, I just can't. I get distracted, I get bummed out, I think I suck, I think other people suck, I get busy with nothing - there's a billion different excuses that I use to keep myself from writing.
In my creative peak (which, admittedly, was 13 years ago...god, I'm old) I could crank out 4 chapters in a night. If I can get 4 done in a year, then I'm doing rather well for myself. Le sigh.
In a way, I wonder if I'm somehow intentionally sabotaging myself. Maybe I don't want to get this story done too fast, because it has such a definite ending. Characters that I've come to regard as family members are going to die, either figuratively (when the story ends) or literally. Maybe I drag my feet because I'm just not ready to say goodbye to these people yet, especially when I've only just said hello.
I am nearing the 25th chapter, which signifies the middle of the story. There's still two and a half arcs worth of turmoil on the horizon, but it all seems so...weighted now. It all means something more, because while I should be overjoyed with myself for getting this far, in the back of my head, I'm still worrying about what I'm going to do with myself when it's over.
I hate ending things. I don't even like the idea of ending this post. I suppose I could come up with a neat closing line like, "see ya later, guys and dolls!" Or maybe, "And the moral of the story is, brush and floss daily! Goodnight, kids!" But nope...don't wanna.
...to be continued...
I want to write. I do. I want to write words and stories and dialogue and punctuation marks and adjectives and...you get it. I want to focus and create and get excited and more often than not, I just can't. I get distracted, I get bummed out, I think I suck, I think other people suck, I get busy with nothing - there's a billion different excuses that I use to keep myself from writing.
In my creative peak (which, admittedly, was 13 years ago...god, I'm old) I could crank out 4 chapters in a night. If I can get 4 done in a year, then I'm doing rather well for myself. Le sigh.
In a way, I wonder if I'm somehow intentionally sabotaging myself. Maybe I don't want to get this story done too fast, because it has such a definite ending. Characters that I've come to regard as family members are going to die, either figuratively (when the story ends) or literally. Maybe I drag my feet because I'm just not ready to say goodbye to these people yet, especially when I've only just said hello.
I am nearing the 25th chapter, which signifies the middle of the story. There's still two and a half arcs worth of turmoil on the horizon, but it all seems so...weighted now. It all means something more, because while I should be overjoyed with myself for getting this far, in the back of my head, I'm still worrying about what I'm going to do with myself when it's over.
I hate ending things. I don't even like the idea of ending this post. I suppose I could come up with a neat closing line like, "see ya later, guys and dolls!" Or maybe, "And the moral of the story is, brush and floss daily! Goodnight, kids!" But nope...don't wanna.
...to be continued...